So it goes a little something like this:
‘Hi, how are you?’
‘Oh I’m so busy, how are you!’
‘Tell me about it hon, I’m super busy too!’
‘We should catch up.’
‘Yes absolutely, it’s been ages, I really need a good catch up.’
There is usually sighing involved, an eye roll or two sometimes a quick hug and then off in opposite direction you scurry with a ‘back to it’ stride in your step.
But 'Busy' is not actually an answer to the question ‘How are you?’ not technically. Busy is an adjective - a doing word. If we substituted other doing words for the word busy the conversation might go a little something like this:
‘How are You?’
‘Working - a lot.’
How are you?
‘Parenting - my children 24 hours a day.’
How are you?
‘Cleaning - the house ALL - THE - TIME.’
It just doesn’t make sense, yet the majority of us say we are Busy when asked how we are.
Busy is a badge of honour, a club, a bright shiny beacon-y word to remind us how important our lives are, how important we are.
Busy can be a reason too.
A reason to not call your mum, to not have a coffee with a friend, to not spend time laughing with your special people, not exercise, not follow through with tasks, not do the washing, not post on your website! Yep, I’m drawing on personal experience here people!
At this time of year in the lead up to Christmas, end of year school commitments, work getting dare I say it…busier and let’s throw in there moving to a new town which is approximately 500 kilometres from anything else, Busy is my answer.
It’s my reason, my excuse.
Busy is the thing that prevents me from living the life I truly want to be living, from focusing on what’s important and from having a good time. For most of us it’s what causes sleeplessness and fuels exhaustion.
Well, my relationship with Busy is nearing it’s end, as far as I’m concerned…Busy can go and shove itself somewhere unmentionable!
It’s not clever or wonderful to be busy. It’s not something we should be proud of, it is actually a choice you make to be operating from a particular mind set and in truth distracts us from living life presently and fully.
Be engaged in what you do, be focused, challenge yourself and work hard but remember to always…ALWAYS… make some space for fun and play, for chatting with your special people doing something you have never done before or just relaxing in a hammock with a bloody good book.
As a little experiment, I’m going to challenge myself, to take a little tiny moment and think before answering the next time someone ask ‘How are you?’ Tell them HOW I actually am, how I’m feeling and ask them how they really are. Feel free to do this experiment too and see how different your conversations can be. I’ll let you know how it goes and if you want to do the same leave a comment below.
Have Fun Get Happy